Brrreep brrreep brrreep.
Operator: Mr. President, I have Ms. Pelosi on the line.
BO: Put her through.
NP: Mr. President. Barry Dunham Soetoro. What are you doing?
BO: Uh, what do you mean, Nancy?
NP: I mean with this bombing business in Libya. Our anti-war base is raising hell. Some influential right-winger people are asking questions about the Constitutionality of this.
BO: Constitution? Oh. That. Uh, we have to support the freedom fighters – you know – the revolutionaries, the opposition to Ghadafi. He’s got to leave, like Hosni left Egypt.
NP: What about the Saudis? They just fired on their demonstrators a few days ago. And the Yemenis. They killed forty-two civilian demonstrators. Are you going to send bombs there, too?
BO: Uh, that all depends.
NP: On what , Mr. President?
BO: On the United Nations.
NP: What on earth are you talking about, Mr. President?
BO: Uh, this is not about danger to Americans. This is about making the United Nations stronger. We must enforce the resolution. Protect the Libyans. Protect the Afghanis. Protect the Egyptians. Protect the Black Panthers.
NP: Are you saying that if the U.N. calls for artillery fire on Saudi Arabia, you’re going to give it to them?
BO: Uh, not Saudi Arabia.
NP: Why not?
BO: Uh, the King is my friend. You saw the photos, right?
NP: You mean the ones of you bowing and scraping at his sandals?
BO: Uh, yes. But I was really just looking down to see if my shoe was untied.
NP: Whatever, Mr. President. You’ve got to be careful with this bombing stuff. The public support for the war is at an all-time low. What if the Muslim Brotherhood comes out in control of all these countries?
BO: Uh, Muslim Brotherhood?
NP: Yes. The group that sponsored and fathered Hamas, al Qaida, Hezbollah – all the terrorist groups. What if the Muslim Brotherhood gets a grip on all of those nations?
BO: Uh, would that be a bad thing?
NP: The news media might criticize us if we lose the entire Middle East to the Islamists. What are we going to do if the press turns on us?
BO: Uh, they won’t. Good-bye.